A Life-Saving Cow

Six consecutive days of spring rain had created a raging river running by Nancy Brown’s farm. As she tried to herd her cows to higher ground, she slipped and hit her head on a fallen tree trunk. The fall knocked her out for a moment or two. When she came to, Lizzie, one of her oldest and favorite cows, was licking her face. The water was rising. Nancy got up and began walking slowly with Lizzie. The water was now waist high. Nancy’s pace got slower and slower. Finally, all she could do was to throw her arm around Lizzie’s neck and try to hang on. About 20 minutes later, Lizzie managed to successfully pull herself and Nancy out of the raging water and onto a bit of high land, a small island now in the middle of acres of white water.

Even though it was about noon, the sky was so dark and the rain and lightning so bad that it took rescuers another two hours to discover Nancy. A helicopter lowered a paramedic, who attached Nancy to a life-support hoist. They raised her into the helicopter and took her to the school gym, where the Red Cross had set up an emergency shelter.

When the flood subsided two days later, Nancy immediately went back to the “island.” Lizzie was gone. She was one of 19 cows that Nancy lost. “I owe my life to her,” said Nancy sobbingly.

A Jealous Girlfriend

Gary and Alma were having problems, again.

"But you told me it was okay to call up Carol," said Gary. "I asked you if it was okay to talk to her, because it was her birthday and I've wished her a happy birthday every year for the last 10 years."

"But you had already promised me that you would never call her again. You promised me that. So, you lied to me."

"But I had forgotten that I told you that. You know that I forget things. I'm not going to argue with you; you have a memory like an elephant. But you've got to believe me, I completely forgot. And more important, Carol is just a friend."

"No, she isn't. She's still in love with you."

"But I'm not in love with her. She can love me all she wants, but I'm not in love with her. I never was!"

"Well, you say that. Maybe it's true. Maybe it isn't. But the important thing is that you never know what the future will bring. You say that nothing will happen between you and her, but you don't know that for sure, because you don't know the future."

"Yes, you're right. No one knows the future. I could fall in love with her again, and she and I might run off and get married and have nine or ten kids."

"Again? What do you mean 'again'?"

A Hot Day and a Cool Pool

It was their first vacation together in years. Meg and Oscar had been running their own jewelry business for years. They made a nice income, but they were busy all the time. They went to one trade show after another, flying throughout the US and often to China and other countries. Their last vacation was at least ten years ago. Recently, Oscar’s doctor said that Oscar’s high blood pressure was going to be the death of him. After questioning Oscar about his eating and exercise habits, he concluded that Oscar was stressing himself out at work. He told Oscar that he needed to stop and smell the roses more often.

“In short,” he said, “I’m writing you a prescription for two weeks of R&R—rest and relaxation, immediately. In fact, I want you to take off four weeks a year, and these must be nonworking vacations. No cell phone, no laptop. Do you understand me? In case you don’t, I’m telling Meg, too. You might not listen to me, but you will listen to her.”

Meg canceled all their activities for the two weeks at the end of July. Fortunately, they did not have any flights scheduled. She booked them a nice hotel near Palm Springs. “We’ll catch up on our magazines, newspapers, and TV reruns,” she told Oscar. “We won’t even TALK about work for two weeks, okay? We’ll relax in the pool, get massages, and treat ourselves like royalty. Got it?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Oscar said, smiling as he saluted her.

The hotel had failed to tell them that it was undergoing renovations. But when it offered everything at half price, Meg and Oscar stayed. The second morning, about 10, Oscar told Meg he was going to take a swim. She told him not to forget his sun block. She went back to sleep. When she woke up at noon, she put on her swim suit and went outside.

She couldn’t stop screaming when she saw Oscar submerged beneath the water. His foot had gotten caught in a suction vent that workers had not covered properly. He had been under water for ten minutes.

A month after the funeral, back home, Meg was going through her mail. The hotel, apparently worried about a lawsuit, had sent her an offer to stay there free for a month. The congenial letter suggested that she “Bring a friend!”